Gina Heslop
In this humorous tale, we are introduced to a 70-year-old widow who decides to take matters into her own hands when her husband is late coming home again. Feeling cranky and fed up with his constant tardiness, she writes a note stating that she’s had enough and has left him. With determination, she hides under the bed to witness his reaction when he finds the note.
Soon enough, the husband arrives home, and the woman listens attentively from her hiding spot as he moves around the house. She hears him enter the bedroom and approach the dresser where she left the note. Anticipating his response, she waits anxiously to see how he will react to her message.
To her surprise, she hears him chuckle and then start writing on the note. Curiosity getting the best of her, she strains to hear what he is saying. He picks up the phone and dials someone, informing them excitedly that she’s finally gone, expressing his joy at her departure.
The woman can’t believe what she’s hearing as the husband continues to talk on the phone, making flirtatious comments and expressing his anticipation to meet with the person on the other end. He talks about their plans to engage in “naughty things” that they both enjoy.
Feeling a mix of emotions, the woman is filled with rage and tears as she realizes what her husband’s reaction truly means. He isn’t upset or concerned about her departure; he’s thrilled and excited for the opportunity to spend time with someone else.
Finally, the husband hangs up, grabs his keys, and leaves the house. The woman, still hidden under the bed, listens to the sound of his car driving away. Overwhelmed with emotions, she emerges from her hiding spot and retrieves the note to see what he wrote in response to her message.
To her astonishment, the note simply says, “I can see your feet. We’re outta bread: be back in five minutes.” The husband’s reaction was not about her leaving but rather a humorous comment on her hiding place.
